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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/25362259">Before I Burn</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/yeolissoft/pseuds/yeolissoft'>yeolissoft</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>EXO (Band)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Angst, Baekhyun is sad, I'm Sorry, M/M, Memories, Sick Byun Baekhyun, Writing a letter</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-08-08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-08-08</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-05 08:42:40</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Major Character Death</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>902</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/25362259</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/yeolissoft/pseuds/yeolissoft</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>"I feel like I’m burning. But before I burn, Chanyeol, let me ask you one more question."</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Byun Baekhyun/Park Chanyeol</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>41</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Collections:</b></td><td>Challenge #5 — Opposites Attract, flashfics</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Before I Burn</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>I'm so happy I got to join Tiny Sparks again with this little story.<br/>This time the story was 'Opposites attract' and I hope you will notice, while reading, that I kept it really simple. As in: they are really different personality wise. </p><p>Anyways. Have fun &lt;3</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The typewriter made loud clicking noises and even though Baekhyun's fingers were already starting to hurt, he kept typing. This was important, it had to be completed before he felt <em>too tired.</em></p><p>A quick glance at the big clock hanging over the wooden door, made him stop for a little while. It was 4.12 am and Baekhyun couldn't remember when the time has been starting to go by so fast. Maybe this was also one of the many side effects he had to deal with nowadays. It definitely had to be the worst one yet. Yes, he was in pain, and yes, he was suffering but, more than anything in the world, Baekhyun needed more time right now.</p><p>He started typing again and memories started to consume him.</p>
<p></p><blockquote>
  <p><br/>
</p>
  <p>My dear Chanyeol,</p>
  <p>I hope you're doing well wherever you might be right now.<br/>
I've been thinking of how to write to you and came to the conclusion that there is no good or simple way to tell you this. I wish you could be here with me and help me with all the stuff that I still need to sort out.<br/>
I'm honest, I'm a little scared. When they gave me my diagnosis I didn't know if I should laugh or cry. So I did both, alone, in the hospital toilet stalls. I know, I know.. you don't have to say anything. It wasn't my best day. I was supposed to have 5 months, but it's been a year, and I'm still here.<br/>
But I can feel my time running out. It feels like something is slipping through my fingers. I'm desperately trying to hold on but my life is gliding away from me. Who knew dying would be such a difficult thing? I always thought I could just fall asleep next to you and never wake up again - gray hair, wrinkles, and everything.<br/>
Life hasn't been easy since you left me. Everyone keeps asking me how I'm doing and if I'm ready for love again. They don't understand that I'm still so very much in love with you. I'm always gonna be.<br/>
They also don't understand us. They don't get how we fit together so well. You were always so adventurous and curious, while I'm <em>just me.</em> Boring me, loves lazy weekends and staying inside more than anything. But you brought out the best in me and I believe, I calmed you down when you got a little too excited. We fit like two puzzle pieces, and maybe they don't have to understand.<br/>
Hey Yeollie? I don't think I've ever written you a love letter. I'm so sorry, I should have been a better boyfriend. You were always so romantic and you cared about me more than anyone else ever has. I'm so thankful for you. You made me feel all sorts of amazing things. Made my heart flip and my tummy feel like it was full of fireworks or those little sprinklers you used to love so much. You burned your fingers on them every time, and yet, you still adored them. That’s how I felt. Hell, I even feel that now when I think of you.<br/>
I know I didn't say it often but I love you. I love you so much. You deserved so much more and maybe in my next life I'll give you everything I wasn't able to give you in this one. So wherever you might be, I hope we'll meet and we'll fall in love all over again.<br/>
Writing this letter made me realize, God, I miss you so much. You should be here with me right now. I'm so alone and everything just hurts. You know, sometimes I think, you will just walk around the corner and sit down with me. And you would smile, and that would be enough. Maybe I wouldn't feel the pain anymore. But I'm selfish, am I not? Because, then, I would leave you and you would be the one wandering around being lost. And I don't want to see you in pain ever again.<br/>
How was it? Did it hurt? Did everything just suddenly stop?<br/>
I feel like I don't really understand death, but I don't have to, right?<br/>
Maybe it's really just like falling asleep.<br/>
Falling asleep... I'm getting tired now, Chanyeol, I don't know what to do.<br/>
Chanyeol, I'm scared, but I can't keep writing anymore my fingers hurt. I feel like I'm burning. But before I burn, Chanyeol, let me ask you one more question.</p>
  <p>Will you wait for me in our new life?<br/>
I hope you will.</p>
  <p>Yours always,<br/>
Baekhyun<br/>
</p>
</blockquote><p>After finishing the letter, Baekhyun neatly folded the paper with shaky hands. He didn't even take off his slippers anymore, already falling onto the bed.</p><p>'Tomorrow I'll ask the nurse to bring me to the graveyard so I can read him the letter.' Not knowing that these were gonna be his last awake thoughts in this life, he fell asleep. Pale, delicate hands, clutched the folded paper to his chest while Byun Baekhyun was experiencing his last dream. </p><p>It was truly a beautiful dream. He was holding Chanyeol's hand while they were walking along the beach. Just walking, nothing else. But that was all Baekhyun was longing for. Something simple and a little bit of happiness.</p><p>In his sleep, he started to smile. And then he took a deep breath. </p><p>His last one.</p>
  </div><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_foot_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff"><p>Thank you for reading. Leave a comment and let me know what you think? ♡</p><p>(did someone catch the little hamilton reference lyrics? ˙˚ʚ(´◡`)ɞ˚˙)</p><p>find me on  <a href="https://twitter.com/yeolissoft">twitter</a></p></blockquote></div></div>
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